A Sikh Girl curious about my long hair - Visit to Sikh family

I have 3 women in my life who appreciate my long hair and encourage me to grow them long and strong. They take care of my hair through hair oiling, head massage and helping me to sport in different styles. First are my elder sister Uma, my mother Laxmi and my cousin Savita.

Now, there is one more addition to this group of women, a young Sikh girl Japtej Kaur whom I met in bus and she was curious about my long hair. We decided to meet. Today being weekly off, we decided to meet at Japtej Kaur’ s home.

Since I met her, I stopped shaving and allowed facial hair to grow and I have been coiling my hair on top of my head like a Sikh boy in my home also.

My mother was upset with me as she wants me to be like her daughter at home wearing Uma's clothes, sporting hair like a woman and clean shaven.

Mother asked me, Why you are living like a Sikh man? I gave lame excuse.

Today morning, I again rolled my hair on top of head in a topknot and wrapped them in patka as sported by Sikh boys.

I went to Japtej Kaur’ s home. When I entered her house, I found two pretty girls with hair reaching their buttockss. I recognized Japtej Kaur the other one was her young brother with equally long hair. His name is Satvir Singh.

His mother entered in the drawing room. She was sporting her thick long hair in a nicely oiled braid.

Her father works in India Army and currently posted in Assam.

Japtej Kaur introduced me to her mother and younger brother. Her mother was so happy to see a Sikh boy but Japtej Kaur clarified that he is not a Sikh man but a Tamil boy with long hair.

They insisted me to remove my patka and show them my long hair.

So, I opened my topknot and let my long hair loose. With strokes of hand, I made them straight and brushed back.

My hair length is crossing my mid back. All of them appreciated my hair length and quality of hair.

Mother appreciated my vow, not to cut hair and encouraged me.

Since, Japtej Kaur and Satvir Singh have washed their hair, aunty wanted to oil and comb their hair. She asked me to watch their hair oiling

She brought a bottle of Sesame oil. Sesame oil is popular in Punjab for hair oiling.

She began with Japtej Kaur. She poured handful of oil in palm and poured on her scalp. Then she massaged her head by tapping her palm over her head. Again she poured large quantity of oil in palm and started applying on her long hair. Her hair was neatly oiled. Then she brushed her hair backward and started combing neatly. She removed tangles and matted hair and preserved them as Hair is god’s gift for Sikhs so they don't throw it in garbage but in Holy River at their pilgrimage centre.

She started braiding her hair and what a beautiful, shiny tight braid crossing her buttocks. Amazing.

Then she asked her to prepare tea for us and called Satvir Singh.

She asked her to take his hair in front and combed them in reverse direction. She poured lots of hair oil and combed his hair from his neck in front direction. After combing, she started braiding in reversed direction and after his braid was done, she coiled his braid on top of his head.

It was my turn. Mother suggested me to sport hair like Satvir Singh and I also sported oiled braided bun.

We chatted over a cup of tea and then I signed out.

At home, mother smelled my hair and asked me which hair oil you applied, when I replied sesame oil she was not happy at all.

It's clash of culture. In south India its coconut oil preferred whereas in north its sesame oil

Mother asked me to wash it thoroughly so that I can get rid of it.

It's situation like "Two States" movie in our home.

Let's see.

 

 

Reminisces 1 : Childhood Hair Care - Nostalgia

Whenever  I see Sushmita Sen tossing her glorious mane while endorsing a brand of shampoo I am taken back to an era where letting hair  open  was a taboo  and shampoo, a mysterious commodity hardly found in shopping lists of India. It also brought back haunting memories of the travails of my thick long black hair which while evoking envious glances from people around while also hiding a painful story of grooming it.

My long hair had an ambitious guardian in my grandmother. The daily ritual started in the morning with my grandmother applying liberal amount of coconut oil followed by combing the hair with a wide teeth comb and then again with a fine teeth comb to remove nits or lice. Then a center parting was taken and two tight straight plaits were made which ended with black ribbons knotted tightly.The same ritual was repeated without fail in the evening after my return from school. Even a slight movement of my head during this ritual would get me a tight slap on my back.

She used to make a concoction of oils with hibiscus flowers and mehendi leaves  boiled on slow heat and then cooled and filtered. The strong smell of the oil meant that I received stern warnings from the school to not use such nauseatingly strong smelling hair oils in the future.

Sunday was the day I dreaded the most as it was the day for oil bath. Early morning I would find my grandmother wake me up and apply hot oil with cumin seeds and pepper on my hair.  After this, she would vent her anger on my innocent scalp, with heavy pounding and tapping in the name of massage followed by washing with Shikakai powder soaked in the starch of cooked rice.

The next process was of drying the hair. With no hair dryers at that time, my grandmother would burn charcoal pieces, with sambrani powder sprinkled on them, on a spatula with a bamboo basket  covering it where I had to spread my hair. Once that was done, the hair was combed back into tight plaits.

The customary oil bath was a traumatic experience leaving me with a throbbing headache. Once my hair was infested with lice and nits and when all the efforts of my grandmother failed, she took the extreme step of dousing my hair with a mixture of kerosene and gamaxin powder (both pesticides). While there were instant results for such an extreme step, it left me with an itching scalp with painful boils all over. We had to seek the advice of a doctor and it took some time before the condition of my scalp improved.

Now I look at my dull grey hair, looking forlorn. In these days when a simple hair treatment in a beauty parlour makes one poorer by a few thousands I marvel at my grandmother who gave me all those hair treatments for free!

Dressed like a school girl - Twin braids

Today morning I firstly had clean shave and then I washed hair with shampoo and then conditioned them with apple cider vinegar plus water mixture. Then I rinsed conditioner with water again. I wrapped hair in towel and rolled them in a bun on head for drying.
I asked mother to give me her sari, blouse. Mother suggested me to wear salwar kamij of Uma (my elder sister). I was ok with it for a change.
I wore clothes on my own. For draping saree I need a woman's help for sure right now.
My hair still wrapped in towel. After 20 minutes, I removed towel and dried hair with gentle towel strokes.
Then I called Uma for doing my hair as she promised yesterday.
I picked up coconut oil bottle and wide tooth and fine tooth comb. I sat on floor with my open hair covering my back. My hair with bit damp.
Uma poured oil in a cup and started applying on my scalp. Then she evenly applied on head by making portions and finally over length of hair. She applied extra quantity on hair ends.
First she combed hair with wide tooth comb and after detangling, she started combing with fine tooth comb. She brushed all hair backward.
My hair looking sleek and tightly combed. She asked shall I make a single braid?
I requested her to make school braids. She middle parted hair and made 2 sections. She asked mother to give ribbons as school braids need it.
She completed one braid and made a loop and tied again near head with ribbon. And then she finished second loop of braid.
Then she put little make up on my face with bindi, earrings etc.
Today I was in avatar of a school girl. I had spiritual high.
My feminine side is getting balanced.
I was in meditative state for quite some time.

Oiling and braiding my sisters hair

My mother's well oiled braid looked so beautiful that my elder sister Uma was quite impressed. She was curious and asked mother who did your hair? Mother replied my new daughter "Priya"
Uma was after me to do her hair. She brought hair oil and two combs.
She sat on floor and I sat behind her on chair.
I opened Uma's braid. Her waist length hair cascaded on her back. They needed oiling.
Uma asked me to apply lots of hair oil since she wanted sleek look of her hairstyle.
I mid parted her hair with comb and poured hair oil on her scalp and patted with palm. Then I massaged her head.
I applied oil on back of her head and then coated strands with oil. She was seeing it in mirror held in hand.
When she was satisfied with amount of oil, I started combing her hair with wide tooth comb. I removed damaged hair, matted hair, detangled.
Then I combed with a regular comb. Oil was dripping after every stork of comb. I applied oil again onger scalp.
Once oil soaked, I asked her which hairstyle she wants? She opted for a braided bun.
I made a nice tight braid of her hair and rolled it into a bun. I secured with pins.
My sister was looking very beautiful in sleek hair and braided bun.
Since I am living as a woman, my sister is happy because she has a sister.
She promised me to do my hair tomorrow.
Since it was night, I thought I shall sleep with simple bun or topknot. Braided bun will be uncomfortable.
Uma opened my braided bun and she combed my hair.
I decided to wear topknot. brushed my hair forward and rolled them into bun on top of head.
I was looking forward for my sister to do my hair.

Oiling and braiding mothers hair

Right now I am living as a woman as per advice of my spiritual master. So we are three women in home. 2 real - my mother and elder sister and third myself as temporary status until my feminine side of personality is balanced.

Mother said, since you are also a girl, please do my hair today. My mother has long hair upto waist length which she normally keeps tied in bun or sports a braid.

She applies coconut oil almost everyday. Her age is 52 but still not a single grey hair.

She sat on floor and I sat on a chair behind her. I poured coconut oil on her scalp and patted on her scalp. Then I poured some more oil on my palm and applied on her head. I gave her a good head massage.
After head massage, I applied oil on her strands and then I combed hair with gentle strokes. I removed tangles.
My mothers hair looking sleek and straight.
Then I made 3 portions of her hair and started braiding. I made a tight braid of my mothers hair.
She was very happy to see a well oiled nice tight braid. She complimented me.

I love my mother. Its her care and nourishment that I could grow my hair long although being a man.

I tied a festoon of Jasmine flowers on her braid.
I will update on my experience of living as a woman

Be like a woman for balancing feminine side of personality (yin-yang)

I am a long hair man. I have been growing hair since last 6 years and my hair length around 2 feet which reach my mid back. I have been growing hair for spiritual reason and I have taken a vow not to cut my hair as advised by my spiritual master.
I oil my hair everyday to keep them healthy, neat and tidy.
Normally I wear my hair in topknot like lord Shiva.
Since last few days, feminine side of my personality became prominent. I felt that I am consort of Lord Shiva and I had a desire of being a woman.
I consulted my spiritual master and he recommended me to balance male and female (yin-yang)energies in my personality which is evident after deep meditation for longer duration.
He suggested me to live like a woman for few days, unless my feminine side is balanced and desire is fulfilled.
So the journey towards temporarily becoming a woman started.
I shaved my beard.
I requested my mother to sport my hair like a woman which she happily agreed. I washed my hair and wrapped them in a towel bun on top of my head to dry.
After few minutes, my mother asked me to seat on floor and she sat on a stool with a bottle of Parachute coconut oil.
Mother applied coconut oil elaborately on my scalp and other portions of head. She elaborately applied oil to each hair strand head to end. I was holding a mirror in my hand and I was enjoying sleeking of hair by mother.
Then mother combed my hair with several strokes of comb which evenly spreaded oil. Then she started braiding my hair. She made a nice tight braid of my long oiled hair.
Mother asked me whether I would like to tie a braided bun? which I happily agreed. Mother rolled my hair in a braided bun and secured with pins.
I loved my sleek hair and braided bun so much. I was satisfying feminine side of my personality.
My mother had brought jasmine flowers stringed together (Gajra) and she decorated my braided hair bun by tying Gajra around it.
Then she helped me to wear blouse, sari. I sported bindi, I wore ear rings.
I has spiritual high and I was enjoying my transformation.
Next day, mother oiled hair and made a nice tight braid.
I am enjoying being in this state

Tamil mother, Sikh father - Long hair son becomes classical dancer

Sangeeth sing and his family are living in Delhi as the name indicate he is a sing his fathers name was preetham sing but he is no more he died when he is only 8 his mother seetha is working in a government office she is a Tamil women they are love married when they are studying in same collage Sangeeth is only child in house he is young cute whitish short and slim figure with a big turban on head he lived with his mother grand mother and aunty ,his moms sister is a divosie and she is working in a textiles as an accountant her name is swetha she is young and cute like his mom his grand mother is still cute at the age of 47 she wear beautiful sarees and ornaments and very good in classical music they three lived in a traditional way of Tamils wake up early bath early put tulsi leaf on hairs. wear beautiful sarees when they go out or salvar in day time and nighty in night they three have long beautiful hair too After his fathers death his mom have decided that he should live like a sing as his father was  9/22/09  jaya 
Sangeeth was not good in studies but good in singing and dancing his aunt taught him some steps of classical dance his mother too know some but they tell your face will not show any sought of expressions. though he is living with 3 women's he is very shy in nature and do not talk too much also he don't have company with other boys the only company of him is sneha another Tamil family living in same town she always talk so much about all thing and always play on him she always laughed at him saying boy with big head. His turban is very big that is why….
But when he completes the pedigree education he wants to join b- Ed collage. he got admission in a collage at panipat he stay there and studied when he went to study outside he is completely changed he will not sit in his house he comes very late in night when he is in house and speak little to his relatives they always complain him about his nature and also force him to sit in his house. while he go out he smokes a lot and his mom and aunty always advise him about this bad this habit .
One day when he is coming to delhi from panipat he arrived there in late knight but that day was a strike in delhi so his mom told him that stay in snehas house which is near to railway station.he reached there at 11 30 night on next day sneha wake up early and went to Sangeeths room with a cup of tea she was shocked, he is sleeping in a pyjama only. his turban was tied out and his hair was loose over his back it was below his hips and nice silky and beautiful like a lady when he open his eyes he jumped and tie his hair but she said no she want to see his hair ones more and she called her mom she was also shocked and said it so nice and if sneha have this much hair she should combed it daily and wear beautiful flowers on it he said it is common for sings and I also do my hair secretly I never show my hair to my mom or any one yet ,they never asked me till now to show my hair she said your mom granny and aunt have beautiful hair so this is hereditary  9/22/09  jaya 
When he went home 3 women's are waiting with a smile and asked him to show his hair and said that sneha told them about in phone he don't agreed first but at last he show it seeing this his aunty put a hair clip on his hair and said see mom his hair is longer than we three while they talk grandma took his jasmine flower from her hair and fix it on his hair and said boy if u are a girl I will definitely comp your hair daily and fix jasmine flowers on it . mom asked him that if she give a saree and blouse will he wear ,aunty also told that he look so cute in a saree but he does not agree and escaped from there
In that year he got dismissed from collage for entering collage by drinking liquor but he did not said this in his house and stay in hostel one day his mom got letter from collage and they went there become so angry with him the management said that only way is pay a good amount of fees and a punishment transfer to any where at last I heard that all seats were filled in all collages so I got a special massage from them that there is a vacancy in a women's collage in Delhi there special rule that every women's collage can admit one male student I am in a confusions but mom and aunty was compelling me and they forcefully joined there with out my permission and said that if you want to study you can join there this is a small punishment On the first day when I go to collage there is some senior girls they are the most dangerous they ragged all girls come around me and told me to tied out long hair turban. All are wondered when they saw my long hair. It was long below my hips some ladies come to me and hold my hand in back and 2 ladies come forward and braid my long hair then they fix a bunch of jasmine flowers in it and said this is the way for you to come to collage principal hear this warn that girls but he continued his bad habbits and behave very badly to his family members  9/22/09  jaya 
After some days it was study leave so he go every time outside and do not study any thing one day he become sick and coughing badly seeing this his mom went with him to doctor, the lady doctor asked did u smoke he hesitatingly said yes on that day sneha said to mom that he smokes very badly that day his mom did not allow him to go out on next day he went secretly out side and smoke again on his come back his mom said you should sit in house and take rest for a month so your disease may go and your smoking habit may become less more over you can study your lessons in study leave he said no mom it is so boring to sit between three ladies their murmurings about others, saree styles, tele serials …..I am a boy I am not interested in their topics more over I hate these ladies groups and said I am not going to change my habits and I will go out when ever I like ,try your level best to stop me going out
When he came back 3 women's are discussing about his smoking they told him not to smoke but he did not hear it on that day night he have some breathing problem 3 women's in the house where so worried and called doctor she said them that he have some infection in lungs and want to take rest and do not smoke for a month and she gave a address of de addiction centre for stimulants they gave a pack of medicine to them and told patient should take rest for a month  9/22/09  jaya 
On that night the three ladies discus very seriously about his habbit and misbehaving aunty said that he should get some punishment for insulting ladies. mom also agree but main problem is how to tie him in house for a month minimum .grandma said I have an idea do it and she said to her daughters.when they call him he is in bath room mom said . mom said there is surprise after bath when he came back his mom said give me your dirty dress he handed it and now standing in a towel then aunty came in and give him a knighty 
He said it is a nighty?
Mom; yes it is a nighty Wear this 
He; No way
Mom; Why
He; I want my dress
Mom; this is your dress
He; No I don't like it
Mom; Ok then I will give you some thing else
And she called aunty
She bought a salwar and shall
Aunty; did u like it
He; No
Aunty; Oh no so only option is you should wear saree and blouse 
He; Why
Aunty; You said try your level best to stop me going out and u badly said about our dresses and styles so u should get a small punishment for that you should know the feeling of wearing ladies dress and if u like it fully we four can use same wardrobe and our expanse can brought down 
Mom; you must wear these dresses and if you want to go out then you can go out in this dress
He; Please mom 
Aunty; No boy 
Mom; None of your dress is going to get for a month
Aunty; You can wear any of these dresses or stay there only in a towel
Then they left room .after some times grand mother came in and sat with him
Boy you are the only expectation of our 3 but you don't have any attachment to us and now a days you are walking in a bad ways so we want to control it you know when your father died your mom was mentally upset for 2 or 3 years same case in your aunt when she become divorced I know how much they love you and we three ladies need a man to support us  9/22/09  jaya 
Hearing this he cried and hugs his grandma and asked what I want to do.
She smilingly show all type of dresses said wear this
He tearfully said I love you grandma and I love you 3 too and obey what ever you want and any dress you said
Hearing this grandma hug me and said I like you my son I really dreamed about a grand daughter but god would not give me one so you should allow me to see a daughter in you and take a blue cotton saree blouse bra petticoat panty and said this is dress you want to wear
He was surprised but he allowed
She handed him the matching blouse. When she pulled it up and clasped the hooks at the front, it fitted him so perfectly that no one would have believed that it was not stitched for him. It covered shapely breasts, standing out proudly she said to me that this is his aunt's .granny said when we have planed this all of us said that her blouse should fit for me now wear this petticoat She was holding a light blue colored petticoat made out of linen. Her petticoat covered his lover pats and legs. Then she picked up the six-meter long sari and laughed at started tying it around me. Granny is an expert on wearing saree he stand there calmly she said I will show how my grandson look beautiful in saree
Then she gave her long chain and 6 bangles 3 each in one hand her angle belt for him to wear ,and when she fixed these items on him and she gave her ear jumka to him and fixed on his ears she then applied make up on his face lined his eyes bindi light lipstick on him and said boy I have one wish too 
He asked what 
She said take your turban 
He do what she said and she braid his long beautiful hair below his hips she then fixed the jasmine flowers which is in her hair
When he looked to mirror he was stunned and his grandma too…. she cried with joy and surprise and said to there daughters stay in front of door a nice seen for you and ................ 
when door opened both of them sat on sofa with surprise both of them came near me and said from today you are our daughter not son mom said that he looks more beautiful if he have a nose stud 
Grandma said we can put hole on his nose tomorrow itself
Aunty said if he is our daughter there is so many boys roam near our house and a plenty of love letters must be there on our letter box hearing this all of us laughed 
Grandma said after you recover from desease you should continue your classical dance class
On next day aunty brought 3 knighies 3 petticoat and 4 brassieres 
Mom brought one golden chain some bangles ear jumka sticker nose stud payals 
On that study leave every day he wear sarees or salwars in day time and nighty in night .he learn very much his subjects and passed the exams in flying colors his smoking hobby is gone 
After that he spends all time in house practice dance moments with his aunty now his feminity is increased. Then aunt, mom and granny sent him Hyderabad for degree course in kuchipudi dance. Now he is the leading female role player in kuchipudi dramas in south India. he can not do male roles because of his nice sweet long hair which is below his hips.
He helps them in cooking and cleaning and washing and likes to wear nighty all the time when he is ni house with out his turban. And we four become good company grandma every day comb his hairs and arrange jasmine flowers on it and our house become like a ladies hostel